Response to It's All Relative - Thoughts From Sarah

I agree with everything you just said.

As someone that has grown up in a religious family, gone to the same church since birth, and has been an active member since she was 13, I find myself asking "What does it all mean now 14 years later?

We live in relatively religious community. We are governed with Christian principles. Most of us label ourselves as Christians, yet God is so distant to many.

During my years as a campus student, there were many ups and downs with my walk with God. I learned to love Him, His Word, and the Message it taught. I made forever friends who have loved me through the darkest of times. I was excited to be a part of a mega campus ministry! I was so happy and in love with the church family I was a part of. I cared deeply for others and served whenever I could. I shared my faith with everyone I could. I met strangers on the road specifically to tell them about Jesus. However, I felt a lot of guilt for many things. I worried what my fellow church members thought of me. I worried if I didn't "look the part" of a Christian. I worried that my clothes weren't cool enough, or my hair wasn't styled just right. I felt guilty when I did not share with the stranger on the elevator. I worried that I wasn't as spiritual as others. I desperately wanted the approval of everyone.
I do not say these things to blame my church or my campus experiences. I made many wonderful decisions, as well as some not wonderful decisions. I grew in my faith, my love for God, and my love for others.
Years later as I grow older in my Christian walk, much has changed. I do not constantly invite strangers to church on the bus. I do not feel guilty if I do not "talk about Jesus" to the cashier in the grocery store. I do not feel guilty for not sharing the Good News with all that I pass by. Sometimes I wear sweat pants and no makeup to church. I work hard to no longer worry what others think of me. I am in love with my Lord, and love sharing with others about Him. However, what drives me now is what my husband constantly reminds me of: People know who Jesus is. People know He died for them. People know the Message. My job, as a Christian is to constantly redefine who He is to me, as well as whom He is to others. I work now to show others a Jesus they didn't learn about in Sunday school on a felt board; but rather a Jesus who is full of grace, compassion, and mercy. The Jesus I know loves me in spite of who I am. He forgives me when I mess up, when I do not take time to read his Word, when I do not take time to talk to Him. No, my Lord is not passive or lukewarm. But, he forgives. He understands. He is free from guilt. This Jesus is the Jesus that I know and love. He is the One who gave me my life, my relationship with Him, an amazing Godly man, and the hope of one day raising children to love and serve Him! I am excited about this Jesus. While I no longer have the dream of being in the full time ministry, I see my ministry as the community I am apart of. My ministry is the people who live in my building, the people I work with daily, the people on my street. My ministry is in my favorite coffee shop, and bookstore. My ministry is to show my community who Jesus is through the love, gratitude, and servitude in my life. My ministry is to show others what life is like when you love God with no inhibitions. This is my definition of Christianity.

"Can a mother forget the baby at her breast?
And have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you. See, I have engraved you on the palms of My hands. You walls are ever before Me." Isaiah 49:15-16